I’m in the middle of reading an article for my sociology class thinking about how much other reading I have to do and ready to break down because I don’t feel like I belong here.
Today I presented a literature review for my intro seminar, that I know is too broad. And I know that as my first one, it’s probably not as big of a deal as I’m making it. I know I’m supposed to learn from everything here.
Like, my GPA does not define me and especially doesn’t now, but still.
I know I want to do research, but I have no idea what I want to do research in yet. I feel like I’m expected to have it all figured out and I don’t.
I feel like I’m living a lie, like I can’t possibly handle everything I’ve taken on.
I don’t know my place in this world, and it sure doesn’t feel like it’s here right now.
Everything in me just wants a break, I want to give up and go live a boring life that doesn’t require I challenge myself.
I don’t know what to do.